I can’t wrap my head around this

I can’t figure out why a professional writer (even one working for Yahoo! Sports) would think this is correct:

bad wrap sports hp

This is a bad wrap, courtesy of Stephanie Hamilton Designs:

wrap

An undeserved adverse opinion is a bad rap.

And then I stopped reading

This is all I could stomach when reading an article on Yahoo! Shine:

bad wrap

I feel like I just bit into a bad wrap involving a soggy tortilla holding sliced turkey beyond its expiration date. A bad rap is a undeserved notorious reputation.

I should have stopped reading with that first sentence. But no, I ventured into the next sentence where the writer doesn’t even know the title of the show. (Dear writer, it’s “Sex and the City.”)

That’s it for me. Two strikes and I’m outa there!

A well-deserved bad rap

This writer for Yahoo! Shine may get a bad rap for her writing skills, and it’s well-deserved. She’s unfamiliar with basic rules of punctuation: There’s no need for a hyphen between an adverb ending in -LY and that word it modifies. She doesn’t know a real buzzword from her made-up “buzz” words. And her ability to match a pronoun to its antecedent is sketchy at best (even implying that “buzz” words have hefty price tags):

buzz words 1

Her random commas strewn about like thumbtacks on a highway stop readers in their tracks:

buzz words 2

Her “bad wrap” just contributes to her bad rap:

buzz words 3

as does her arbitrary hyphenation of antioxidants and her failure to realize that supermarkets have aisles and not isles, which are land masses surrounded by water:

buzz words 4

Can you blame me if I don’t trust anything this writer says about anything?

I think your headband is a little too tight

What happens if your headband is too tight? Does it affect your ability to write? I think so. The headband-wearing writer for “The Thread” on Yahoo! Shine seems to be suffering from an intellectual impairment. She can’t quite spell ponytail:

headband shine thread 1

Nor can she spell Kristen Stewart’s name:

headband shine thread 2

Rapping your head could also lead to brain damage:

headband shine thread 3

I’m really leery of trying a Monalda4 headband after reading this:

headband shine 5

Who knows what a too-tight head wrap could lead to? I might neglect to capitalize the name of my favorite store:

headband shine thread 4

Or confuse grosgrain ribbon with velvet:

headband shine thread 5

(I kinda liked that headband, but not its velvet fabric. I wish it really was wrapped in grosgrain ribbon.)

Oy. Headbands can give you a headache. And so can reading about them. I think I’ll go lie down now.

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