Stay in school and get that diploma!

My advice to this associate editor for Yahoo! Style? Stay in school and get that high school diploma. Or take some GED classes that include basic English vocabulary. Then, you might not make this embarrassing mistake:

matriculation ceremony

That’s from an article about a student graduating from high school, not entering a college or university, which is what matriculation means. It’s a word I’d expect would be familiar to a high school graduate. But maybe I’m wrong.

Messing around with the language

If this Yahoo! Style writer is going to go for a common idiom, she does mess around:

mess aground sty

This delightful malapropism screams funny.

Did anyone hear her signing?

I just don’t understand the controversy that was recently covered by Yahoo! Sports. How many people could actually hear a woman signing the national anthem? I thought signing was a way to communicate with people who are hearing-challenged and therefore didn’t involve sounds:

signing mlb

Shocking truth revealed about Duchess of Cambridge!

In a shocking revelation, a Yahoo! Style writer uncovers a strange abnormality about Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge:

ankle length 1

What we have been seeing as the duchess’s knees are actually her ankles. And Yahoo! provides a picture to prove it:

ankle length pic

That only looks like a knee-length skirt. In fact, according to the anatomy experts at Yahoo!,  it comes to her ankles, which are located where you might expect to see knees.

You’ve got a friend at KFC

Selena Gomez loves friend chicken. At least that’s what this Yahoo! Celebrity writer tells us:

friend chicken cel

If you think readers don’t notice typos, think again. Here are a few comments from readers of the article:

  • “I love a good plate of friend chicken,” she revealed. MMMM, I love me some FRIEND chicken, too. Sheesh, who edits this stuff?
  • Is “friend chicken” a mexican thing?
  • friend chicken? lol. please fix your typo.
  • I also love a good plate of FRIEND chicken.
  • I’ll be on the lookout for “friend chicken”…sounds interesting. In the meantime, will have some KFC tonight in her honor.
  • Extra crispy friend chicken is my fav.

Is that even English?

I think this photo caption was originally written in Japanese and then translated by one of those apps written by someone with very limited knowledge of English:

all is sty

I don’t even know where to start with this one because I can’t understand any part of it. It has something to do with sunglasses, but not the “sports style” worn “a la” (does that mean à la?) Guy Fieri. But Mr. Fieri’s sunglasses aren’t possible, unlike other sunglasses. Is that what the writer meant? I won’t even go into the grammatical problems, of which there are many. I’ll just chalk this one up to ignorance of English and wonder why someone with such limited knowledge is allowed to write for a mega-company like Yahoo!.

Nautical = beige

I have no idea who Joel Edgerton is and after reading this photo caption on Yahoo! Style, I still have no idea:

nautical sty

However, I do know more than the writer, who thinks Mr. Edgerton is wearing a nautical ensemble:

nautical pic

Of course, if nautical is just another synonym for beige, then I guess the writer is correct.

Is that like Caitlin Jenner?

I had no idea that there were that many people transitioning from male to female. But according to Yahoo! Style, there’s a workforce in China made up entirely of 70% women:

70 pc women sty

When the workers complete their gender reassignment, will they be 100% women?

Dumbest statement of the day

Good grief! This little paragraph from Yahoo! Style is horrible on so many levels:

min wage sty

It’s hands-down the winner for “Dumbest Statement of the Day.” I think we might overlook the plural verb are for the singular company because this might have been written by a Brit, where companies are plural, grammatically speaking. (Or it might have been written by someone who knows nothing about English grammar.) But the rest of the text? Truly horrible. The conversions from Sri Lankan rupees to U.S. dollars are ridiculously wrong. And the remaining words are nonsense. And this was written by someone who actually gets paid to write. Disgraceful.

Surprise! Majority of readers laughed at this headline

In a statement that’s sure to amuse fourth-grade graduates everywhere, Yahoo! Sports declares that 48% constitutes a majority:

majority mlb

A majority is more than half. So, by my reckoning, 52% (or a majority) of fans do NOT enjoy bat flips. And I pretty sure the majority of readers don’t enjoy reading such nonsense.

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