Head over heels

Remember the saying “Time wounds all heels”? When my friends and I were in our teens, we used to think it has hilarious and a genius takeoff on the saying “Time heals all wounds.” We knew the difference between heals and heels, which is more than I can say for the staff at Yahoo! Finance:

heels fin

Actual knowledge not required

What does it take to be an assistant editor for Yahoo! Style? Do you have to know about style? I don’t think so. Do you have to know English. Not really. Here’s why I say that:

checkered heals sty

The writer (who is an assistant editor) has no idea what a checkered pattern is. She has confused it with a plaid, which is what Ms. Dello Russo was wearing:

checkered sty

As for her “patent leather heals”? I have no idea what was healed by patent leather. Perhaps the writer, who may be still learning her craft (as well as her subject matter) meant heels.

Judging a book by its cover

Ya know how you’re not supposed to judge a book by its cover? Well, there’s a writer on Yahoo! Shine who’s ignored that advice and is judging celebrity-authored tomes by their cover. And I’m here to judge the writer by her — wait for it — writing. But I have no intention of being balanced. This all about the ghastly grammar, horrific homophones, and poor punctuation.

Let’s look at this excerpt, where the writer confuses a contraction with a possessive pronoun:

That is not good.

It sure looks like the writer is unfamiliar with the function of the comma. Seems that it slipped from its correct location down to separate a subject from a verb. Heal? Really? Is that the part of the stiletto closest to the shoe’s soul?

There’s a comma missing here and a misspelled Anne Geddes:

I can almost understand the missing comma and the misplaced period (because this writer is punctuation-challenged), but misspelling Bret Michaels?

It’s kinda obvious how the singer and “Celebrity Apprentice” winner spells his name. The picture above the caption might be a clue:

What’s with the missing apostrophe in the contraction and the missing hyphen in this two-goof sentence?

Anyone could misspell Barbra Streisand’s name:

although the photo accompanying the caption is a hint as to the correct spelling:

So, you be the judge now. How bad is this?

When a cliché goes wrong

I am not head over heels in love with clichés, but this one from Yahoo! Shine put a smile on my face:


Seeking a cure

One Broadway show has closed soon after the closing of another, according to the Yahoo! Broadway blog:

At least that’s what I think he means. The cure to this sentence is not a healing, but heels.

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