Back to school for you!

The editor for Yahoo! Style should head back to elementary school to learn the importance of the apostrophe:

girls boys no apo sty hp

Without the correct punctuation (and that would be two apostrophes), that headline leaves me scratching my head and dusting the dandruff off my keyboard. Were one girl’s outfits responsible for one boy’s bad grades? Or were many girls’ outfits responsible for many boys’ grades? Or was it one girl’s outfits and many boys’ grades? Or many girls’ outfits and one boy’s grades? Oy, now I’ve got a headache. I think I have to go lay down.

Readers’ favorite writer

If you’re one of those readers who cringes when you encounter a typo or — horrors!— a grammatical error, you’ll want to skip this article on Yahoo! Style. The writer seems to have a problem with a common rule we all learned in third grade:

starss style

Perhaps the writer didn’t know if she was writing about one star (and therefore should use star’s) or more than one (requiring stars’). So, she combined the possessives into misguided mashup.

Was it writers’s block?

Did the Yahoo! Style writer suffer a brain aneurysm or just writer’s block when it came to writing this?

sportss sty

She was probably wondering if she should have used the singular sport’s or the plural sports’ and couldn’t make up her mind, so she did a little melding. Or maybe she just has no idea how to form the possessive of a noun. ‘Cuz she made the same mistake in a photo caption:

winnerss sty

The Kardashians aren’t possessive

The Kardashians might have a lot of possessions, but they’re not possessive. The plural is Kardashians, without an apostrophe. Please ignore what you read on Yahoo! Beauty:

kar

How many can one sentence hold?

How many errors can be squeezed into a single sentence? If it’s on Yahoo! Style, at least four, each of which is completely avoidable:

each of which sty

If you’re writing about people, the preferred pronoun is who or whom, not which. There’s an apostrophe missing in what should be brand’s. And of course there are two misspelled names: Missy Elliott and Cara Delevingne.

Millions of dollars’ worth of errors

If I had a nickel for every error on yahoo.com, I’d have millions of dollars’ worth of nickels.

fp dollars worth

If I had a nickel for every missing apostrophe on Yahoo!, I’d have a lot of nickels.

Blogger’s goal falling on deaf ears

If my goal were to eradicate all writing errors on Yahoo!, I wouldn’t start with Yahoo! Sports because I think my “suggestions” for improvement would be falling on deaf ears. Even if my suggestion is simply to proofread:

rappers goal spo hp

That’s no way to treat Celine Dion’s husband’s death

When dealing with a sensitive subject like death, try not to look like the Einstein on Yahoo! Style who doesn’t know when to use an apostrophe. And try not to do it in a headline:

husbands sty hp

This isn’t baseball

Well, at least the editors at Yahoo! Movies managed to get one possessive form right in this headline:

neesons mov

If this were baseball they’d be batting .500.

Chickens’ hit

Why was the Yahoo! Style writer confused about how to form the possessive of a plural noun like chickens?

chickenss prom sty

Maybe she couldn’t decide if the apostrophe went before or after the S. So, she put it before and after the S. That’s actually quite a clever solution. Totally wrong, though.

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